Self care


Sorry for the silence these last couple of weeks: I was unable to breathe due to a chest infection, which led to my having no energy to get a piece up. Combine that with the moving and everything, you can see how busy I have been.

Even today I am trying for a short post and I wanted to talk about Freud a bit. Not the man, and let’s definitely steer clear of Oedipus; let us instead focus on the theory of the Id, Ego and Superego.

I find myself in a position of having these parts of myself at war: I have to look after myself so that I can continue to run events, meet amazing people (I recently met the brilliant Kitty Blue) and to just DO stuff.

But the things that I *want* are at odds with the things that I *need*.

It’s like being at a fetish fair: I *WANT* all the amazing new toys, but I *NEED* to conceive my cash (though in this scenario, my wants will win out over my needs: Some floggers just have to be purchased, you know?)

The reason I bring all this up is that I see so many people on the scene turning to people like myself: we put ourselves out there as community leaders, we try to run both sext events (lube wrestling this weekend!) And community outreach events (Polyday news in the next few weeks, fingers crossed!)

But we are not all ad brilliant as we ought to be. Many people who do what we do are narcissists, by definition. Sometimes people use these positions to abuse those who do not know better.

This is why I so often urge people to stop and take a break from time to time: Yes, the kink scene is awe inspiring; Yes, we have the best people; Yes, on any given day, chances are we have brilliant events going on…

BUT in this rush to experience everything, to try new kinks, to taste every flavour of cake that is BDSM; in short, to fulfil the wants and desires of our Id, we forget to nourish the ego.

We forget to really protect our mental and emotional health and we risk leaving ourselves open to abuse instead of consensual beatings…

It’s a fine line between the two but it exists and we should be wary of crossing it wherever possible.


Anyway: I am going to be moving in just over a week, so if next week’s post is also a little late, please do bare with me. I promise to get something up, even if it’s just a doodle on the Sunday night.

It looks like we may have a guest post from the wonderful Charlie Forest (find his erotic works here: ) and if I get my way, the amazing Viper will be posting up her piece over the next few weeks too.

Ok guys and gals, that’s all from me in this post: be foolish, happy, wild, sexy & naughty together.

If you enjoyed this piece, consider donating to the patreon: as this will allow us to grow and do big, exciting, scary new things.


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